Dispel your visions of pythons, cobras, or vipers. Each finger-thick red-sided garter only grows between 75 cm and 110 cm long. Simply put, Canadian snakes are not Australian snakes. Eleven of the top ten most venomous snakes in the world live Down Under. Deadly serpents occupy a rather large space in the public imagination, although it is exceedingly rare to actually encounter one, much less be in the unfortunate position to get bitten. Having spent six months travelling across Australia, including several weeks hiking in the outback, the only snakes I saw were in wildlife parks. On the other hand, red-sided garter snakes in Manitoba are a perfect embodiment of Canada. They are harmless, curious, understatedly sweet, and very approachable. Walking along the Narcisse trails, you’ll see well-camouflaged snakes crawling about, and the more you pay attention, the more you will see. It’s also perfectly acceptable to gently pick one up. No visitor to Australia will ever pick up a wild snake and say, “hello, eh?”
While any animal can bite to protect itself, red-sided garters have tiny teeth that won’t break skin even if they feel inclined to try. Instead, the snakes voice any displeasure with an odorous poop that tends to linger. When I picked several up, they seemed quite content to slither about my hand and arm, seemingly grateful that I was not a crow, raven, owl or hawk. Birds and other predators often kill the snakes to eat their nutrition-rich livers, leaving carcasses lying about for other scavengers. There’s just a one in five thousand chance that a red-sided garter will live to old age. Although harmless, you’re advised to keep a close eye on the kids for the sake of the snakes, should the poor reptiles find themselves receiving too much love in a toddler death cuddle.